5 Ways to Open Up and Build Deeper Connections

Forge connections through vulnerability.

Two friends laugh while walking on the beach.

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Learning to open up and be vulnerable is an important step toward building deeper connections and avoiding loneliness. Though it might feel uncomfortable at first, opening up allows one to experience greater love, joy, and empathy. 

By practicing small acts of vulnerability, such as sharing with close friends or journaling, according to PsychCentral, you can gradually increase your confidence and comfort level with vulnerability which can foster relationship development and personal growth.

The Benefits of Vulnerability
Learning to reveal one's vulnerability to others can feel scary or uncomfortable, according to Simply Psychology. People often fear being rejected or are afraid of being judged. Introverts and those who have experienced trauma in the past may find it especially difficult to open up to others.

However, there are a number of benefits of confiding yours deepest thoughts and feelings to others close to you. Researcher Bene Brown tells Simply Psychology that people sometimes try to numb the fear and shame they may feel, by keeping their emotions closed in. This also results in a dampening of positive emotions. 

When a person takes the leap of faith, opens up, and faces their fear head on, they also open themselves up to love, joy, empathy, and other positive feelings.

Opening up to others can build self-confidence, allows you to let go of the past, and helps with self-growth. Often people like being confidants to others, so when one becomes vulnerable, their overtures will be met with kindness and acceptance. 

Ways to Open Yourself Up to Others
Opening yourself up to others could boost your confidence and it can facilitate developing deep friendships and relationships. Here are five tips to help you take the leap of faith and start to confide in those around you.

Start with Baby Steps
Wikihow explains that opening up all at once can be overwhelming and challenging. However, people can build confidence in vulnerability slowly over time. Social media is an excellent platform for starting to open up, as netizens can use it to make “small disclosures,” for example posting about a hard day at work or a life challenge that one faces.

Simply Psychology suggests that gradually becoming vulnerable doesn’t have to stay in cyberspace. Try to find some very close friends or family members and start with small admissions to them, building the relationship and one’s comfort level, until one is ready for the big discussions.

Set Goals
Building one’s vulnerability muscle over time by setting goals, making relationship building a priority, and stepping outside your comfort zone as a part of a daily routine, suggests Wikihow . For example, you might want to have a goal of having at least one deep conversation daily, or bringing up one stressful issue with a close friend or family member every so often.

Focus on Self Confidence
If you are comfortable with yourself, you can be confident speaking to others about their needs and challenges.. There are many ways to boost self confidence, for example learning to compliment your own positive qualities or adding self-care into your routine, even if it’s just taking a few minutes out of one’s day. 

One way is to  practice daily affirmations related to your positive qualities, for example repeating “I am enough” or “I am good at my job.” Journaling about your strengths and accomplishments is another way to build your self-image.

Open up to Those you Connect to
Look for friends with common interests to open up to, for example people who are in the same special interest clubs as you. Start conversations with questions, to help learn about common interests and get comfortable conversing with acquaintances.

Relationship therapist Jenna Nielsen tells Simply Psychology, “Look at your own values and find a person who shares similar ones. That should make it easier to open up.”

Adjust Your Body language and Speech Patterns
Your body posture can reveal a lot about you to others. Wikihow explains that standing up straight up with arms open and keeping eye contact can help a speaker look and feel more confident. When it comes to what to say, be open and honest and use “first-person” or “I statements”

For example, if you want to open up about a relationship concern, instead of saying something like “You don’t make time for me,” try rephrasing it as “I feel that this relationship isn’t a priority to you.”

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