7 Steps to Develop Confidence

How to build confidence and self-worth.

Self-confident woman makes it to the summit.

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Confidence means you believe in your self-worth and your abilities. You feel comfortable in your own skin and allow your authentic self to shine. 

Think of confidence as the foundation for living your best life. Confidence helps to confront challenges, face fears, and handle setbacks, all important elements for a happy, healthy life. When you want to believe in yourself, follow these seven steps to help you develop confidence in yourself.

Recognize your strengths

Everyone has their own unique set of strengths, skills and talents that you naturally excel at doing. When you develop those strengths, you have a better chance of succeeding and building self-confidence. 

So what are your strengths? Take a moment to write them down.  Creativity, patience, listening, and resilience are all examples. You can also consider skills, like cooking, dancing, or painting. Think of your passions and hobbies. If you need help brainstorming, Oprah.com recommends asking a friend to name a few. When you recognize your strengths, and nurture them, you’ll develop more confidence.

This man does not know his inner strength.

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Set healthy boundaries

Boundaries and confidence go hand in hand. The more you maintain healthy boundaries, the more confidence grows. When you understand your boundaries, you’ll have an easier time standing up for yourself and knowing when to say “no”. 

Positive Psychology points out that boundaries can be physical or emotional, for example, not feeling comfortable with someone going through your phone or not allowing someone to take their anger out on you. You can set healthy boundaries by recognizing situations that trigger you and speaking up about your boundaries in an assertive way. As you stand up for yourself and establish strong boundaries, you’ll build that inner confidence and self-love.

Drawing a line.

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Step out of your comfort zone

Psychology Today defines your comfort zone as a “psychological, emotional, behavioral construct that defines the routine of your daily life”. Stepping outside of your comfort zone and taking risks can take a lot of courage. But ultimately, it helps build confidence when you realize that you can handle life’s challenges, navigate uncertainty, and learn from mistakes.

Take a step outside of your comfort zone/

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Surround yourself with uplifting people

Who you spend time with has a big impact on your mindset. As life coach Tony Robbins points out on his website: “When you surround yourself with positive people, you’re more likely to adopt empowering beliefs.” Spend more time with people who have a positive view on life. Recognize naysayers and know when to walk away from toxic people who bring your confidence down.

Have positive friends.

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Embrace your authentic self

Accepting and embracing your true self is the gateway to confidence. My Therapy NYC  suggests that you let go of perfect: focus instead of staying true to who you are. Allow yourself to be vulnerable and open up emotionally. Practice honesty. Trust your intuition and allow your feelings to guide you in the right direction. 

Have confidence in the real you.

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Go for your goals

When you set goals, and work hard to achieve them, you get a huge confidence boost. According to Psychology Today ,write down your goals and check in with yourself to stay on track. You can also consider breaking down your big goals into smaller, actionable steps, which makes it easier to get things done. Each time you accomplish those steps, you’ll feel a boost of confidence.

List your goals to give you the confidence to meet them.

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Celebrate small wins

In this IdeasTed.com, Vancouver-based educator Mehrnaz Bassiri points out, “Small wins have a transformational power. Once a small win has been accomplished, forces are set in motion to favor another small win and another small win until the combination of these small wins lead to larger and greater accomplishments.” 

When you commit to your goals, you deserve to celebrate all your hard work. You did it! Acknowledge your efforts and feel that extra boost in confidence. Share your accomplishments with friends. Take a moment to recognize what you’ve achieved. Maybe you can take a day off and throw a little party.

Start with small goals and celebrate the win.

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