How Masculine and Feminine Energies Impact Relationships

Embracing the balance of masculine and feminine in ourselves and our partner can help attract the right people and lead to more passionate relationships.

Oct 9, 2018

What creates passion and attraction between two people? Many relationship experts like Tony Robbins and Esther Perel explore how physical passion in a relationship results from the polarity of the feminine and masculine energies between two people. The more opposed those two energies, the stronger the attraction. Understanding the balancing of these two energies can help build attraction and keep the passion alive in relationships.

Understanding Polarity: Masculine vs. Feminine

While the things that we have in common bring us together, the polarity between two people, the difference between the masculine and feminine energies, sparks the passion. This polarity refers to that intense physical attraction between two people, and the more opposed those energies, the stronger the attraction in the relationship.

But first, what do each of those essences really mean, masculine and feminine? Generally speaking, the masculine energy drives toward a mission and looks to analyze a problem and solve it. Meanwhile, feminine energy values connection and wants to relate with a partner by sharing a problem.

Masking Our Core Energy

When speaking about feminine and masculine energies, that doesn’t mean gender. In fact, all of us have a blend of masculine and feminine energies. Although we may have a mix of both, people usually have either a stronger feminine or masculine energy. However, life experiences like our fear of not measuring up or not being loved can greatly impact us in a way that leads us to hide our true energy with “masks”.

For example, let’s say a girl has a naturally strong feminine energy at birth. Growing up, her mother teaches her to create a masculine mask so that she never becomes too dependent on a man. Meanwhile, her father acts in a dominating way in order to make her feel stronger, further promoting a masculine mask.

As a woman, she has lost touch with the natural balance of the feminine and masculine energies. This prevents her not only from being herself but also from presenting her authentic self to her partner.

Restoring Balance

Many couples, over time, lose the passion in their relationship. This occurs when partners no longer have the play of masculine and feminine energies between them. If someone with a feminine energy criticizes a masculine person’s struggle with their direction in life, it may kill the polarity between them instantly. Meanwhile, a feminine person may shut down when criticized for looking tired, making that person feel unloved and less vivacious. As David Deida puts it, “Never tell a man with a masculine sexual essence that he is wrong, and never tell a woman with a feminine sexual essence that she is ugly.”

Restoring passion involves cultivating the masculine and feminine qualities in yourself. If in a relationship, this can help can rekindle excitement and playfulness, or if single, attract someone new and exciting. The awareness of this beautiful balance will allow you to be your true self while also embracing the authenticity of your partner.

ALLISON MICHELLE DIENSTMAN, CONTRIBUTOR
Working from her laptop as a freelance writer, Allison lives as a digital nomad, exploring the world while sharing positivity and laughter. She is a lover of language, travel, music, and creativity with a degree in Chinese language and literature.

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